I can not even begin to express how much I miss you tonight. You have been such a wonderful husband and father to our beautiful children. I am still waiting to wake up from this horrible dream. I find I am missing you at the most random times. I miss you more at night. I miss our nights when we used to both lay on a couch and watch absolutely nothing on TV. I miss you finishing my sentences. I miss you making the bacon for breakfast on Sunday mornings. I miss your sweet smile and your voice. I miss your blue eyes. I miss you rubbing your feet or tapping your legs constantly. I miss our conversations about absolutely nothing. I miss your warm embrace and sweet words. I miss everything about you.
It is November and I can't help but try to find things to be thankful for. I am thankful for you for showing me unconditional love. You loved me through all of my crazy bouts, all of my uncontrollable emotions. You always spoiled me and I ALWAYS got what I wanted. It never mattered how much something costs or how much I didn't "need" something, you always found a way to take care of it for me. I am thankful that we had children. The kids are a living legend of our love. I am thankful that I have them here to hold and love. I am thankful for your family. They have not turned their back on me. They love me unconditionally as you did. I am thankful for prayer and for the Gospel. I know that God has a plan for my life and right now I am struggling to see the beauty in all of it, but I know that someday I will. I am thankful for you and all you taught me in our marriage.
This picture was taken exactly one year ago today. Wow, how much can change in a year. We miss you.
Love you, Love Mommy
What wonderful insight that even though we can't see the beauty in this right now, God will reveal it to you in His time. I love that Scotty spoiled you! That is precious. He was so wonderful in that way. And he loved you so much that he always wanted you and the kids to be happy...never telling you no! Hang on Steph. God loves you so much and He won't let this hurt go on forever. I know you will always miss Scotty but I am praying as time goes on the pain will lessen...I am confident it will. Love to you and the kids XOXO
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